She began to flare up, she claimed thats because I flared up first. She said, that will be the time where we are about to lay the bed(chinese call it "An Chuan", so its not encouraged or permissable for anybody to enter our bridal room(masterroom), and anbody whom have family members that have just passed away are strictly not allowed. This is according to tradition and its for our own good. So I said, okie i dont let them enter my room, so living room shouldnt be a prob then right. But both of us are already very unhappy with each other, so our tone arent very nice and friendly. She began to say that shes not going to care for me in future after this event.
I was very sad, after some moments of reflections. I decided to pluck up my courage to write a note and paste it outside the bathroom while shes bathing. I apologised for the harsh tone I used, tho I feel shes the one who started it first. Anyway a sorry doesnt cost much, if it can resolves the tension, why not. Afterall shes my mum. But she walked straight into her room after seeing the note not even acknowledging it. She even throw away the note.
I was pretty upset over it. Haiz, its only one more month that I get to stay with her officially, why cant we both treasure the moments. Why cant we talk well just like what my hubby did to his mother. They never really vent temper to each other before, even if voice was raised, its just out for fun only. Their relationship is very close, I really envy them. I wanted to let my mum know that I really treasure her opinions and I really wanted to treasure the very last month that I get to stay here officially and accompany her. But we just kept arguing and quarreling with each other times after times over this marriage events..over the nitty gritty stuffs..over following the traditions..and over the pattern and style we worked...like she always procrastinate, but I wanted to get everything done with and properly planned. I dont understand why the guy side can, but we cant. Like I dont understand why cant she go ask her relatives who are attending, and who are not now, why must wait till two weeks before when she give out invitation cards. Isnt it too rushed to arrange the guest by then? Here me and hubby are so worry, but there shes not being cooperative. I am so stressed over the whole event. I wanted everything to goes well and according to plans, but theres so many traditions to follow. I dont understand why my sis always end up quarreling with mum when shes getting married last time, just follow traditions, whats so hard about it. But now i know there are really some things that is difficult to follow, and difficult to compromise. Esp when my mother in law is a very modern women who dont know much on these traditional stuffs while my mum is very traditional, I find it hard you know.
I remisice the time where I kept calling mum when Im studying in Australia a few years ago. I missed her so much that I feel so uneasy without talking to her everyday. Now that Im shifting out soon, although its still very near, I just feel very lost and uneasy. How good would it be if we can still stay together or maybe we can travel here and there to stay. But I have to remember that Im not alone now, I have to respect my hubby too.
